Pirate laws

Creative Commons license.
Thanks to Damgaard.

A pirate does not ask for directions. He relies only on his gut feeling, a compass, or a treasure map.

Parrots are the preferred pirate companion. Monkeys are an acceptable substitute, unless they fling their feces at people. Then they are an awesome substitute.

A pirate should always remove his hat in the presence of a bartender.

Pirate Law: A pirate does not use the word "Fabulous". Ever.

Female pirates are allowed some exception to rules concerning hygiene and garmentry, but must make up for it by using twice as much profanity.

Yeah, I know they got the eye patch on the wrong side.

Pirate Laws.